Monday, May 26

time is the master

many years ago
today it was a day full of surprises for her, to begin with he was keen to take her to the hang out joint. "is he out of his mind?", she thought to herself and even expressed the thought in no disguised manner. "what the heck!! what is wrong?" echoed the parents, "we have a train to catch in 2 hours, don't you remember beta?" "oh mom, come on let me take my little sister out just for once, there is a very nice bakery on the way so we can pick up those pastries you two like so much."
it was their son afterall and he had to have his way. so off the two went, as she sat pillion on his 'bike', she wondered whatever happened to those days when he was like this 'fun big brother' to her. well "stupid me", she thought, "there were never such days. it is a utopian belief that elder brothers can be nice and sharing with their 'clingy' little sisters. so while she wondered if there was something, some 'greater' reason behind this sudden shower of brotherly love on her. yes it was true that he had long moved out of the house and she too had grown up ever since then. but still...well she had biiiig doubts.
it was an inkling of the things to unfold that evening. "she is coming here right now." period..... all that they had now was to overcome these 15 minutes of most awkward silence - brimming with rising tide of queries in her mind for him...almost worried that he could hear her brain working full capacity not to sort but to spill them out. she felt it was better not to ask right away, 'she' could be here any minute. it was not a very good first impression to be meeting the "would be" of her only brother, caught on a wrong foot discussing details and stream of 'hows and whys' which were as evident as 'troubles' - that were warned against to pandora.
eventually, they met and it was true that she could not believe many things, many things she almost assumed about her elder brother, and was very glad to find out how wrong she was.. then there were things, which looked cumbersome. any many many more things, suddenly she felt she had grown multiple understandings, many ways to look at the situation. many views which people of one family could hold.. pity, she felt like a grown up now.
how soothingly cosy it felt to be the "youngest in the family'. most of the matters were considered not worth her worries and were never mentioned to. she was blessedly granted to continue with her faith in her warm world where everything was constant...love between the family and its members, equations that were nothing but constant, parents who were always there, studies were a stress of just exam days. it was the big brother's burden to top every year not hers, she was allowed to be happy to pass with decent grades. not many hopes /ambitions for her, anyways she was too young then to understand half the things which go on in any family. whatever was said was true always - was it not?
but not now, somehow today he felt her to be the most appropriate person to first break the news to. to melt the ice, "what was expected of her?". to build the ground ....how?? when she did not know anything about them. what could she possibly say to him or to the parents? was he seeking her opinion at all?
was she so grown up?

2 comments:

Mystic Rose said...

interesting writeup!

sonal said...

beautifully written experience girl.